Listen . . . May 31, 2003 (Stew)
I saw something. Or at least I thought I saw something. Just now, while walking Honey Bear I turned a corner and jumped; because I could have sworn there was somebody walking a dog just off to my left. But when I looked again, there was no one there. That’s the second time today I felt and sensed and could have sworn that I saw a presence that turned out not to really be there. First time was also when I was out walking puppy dog, and I was sure there was somebody behind us. Frustrating feeling.
I’ve decided I want to become a criminal. After watching Ocean’s 11 and The Italian Job I’ve decided that I’m cut out to be some type of criminal. One thing about watching these shows, there’s always at least one person who has some type of disability, like hearing loss. I’d love to see a movie where one of the members of the team has a mental disability, like bi-polar disorder or schizophrenia. How about the completely dysfunctional “crew”. You’ve got your bomb expert – he’s deaf. A blind wheelman. “Lefty” the large one armed “heavy.” A safecracker with parkinsons disease. And the ring leader is schizophrenic with visual and auditory hallucinations. Yeah, I think that’d work.
I was exploring the seedier side of the Web today – sites about hacking and cracking and phreaking. I also found sites that sell alternatives to marijuana, speed, and heroin. There was also this other site that had stuff for sale… from the basic lock picks, to password generators to ways of making free cell phone calls.
I’m not sure what kind of crime I’d want to be involved in, though. Nothing where anybody got hurt. I don’t know, a good heist of some type. But not gold. Gold’s too heavy and too hard to deal with. Something like credit card fraud. Something where the only people who get really screwed are credit card companies and their insurance carriers. (Of course, the stockholders also end up getting screwed because it means a lower net income, blah blah blah.)
If I could figure out a way for 250,000 people to each send me a dollar, I’d do that. But sometimes you have to force them to give up that dollar… thus they get screwed by being investors in credit card and insurance companies. It all equals out in the wash.
Why should they be screwed? Why not? Somewhere along the way they’ve screwed somebody. We’ve all screwed and been screwed. Why not just profit from it once or twice?
And really, is getting caught that detrimental? Assuming I ever saw a prison cell, it would be a nice change I think. Sitting in a 8 x 10 cell staring at the walls. Not much different then my existence now. And there would be more people to talk to. Probably not the most pleasant of people, but it’s not like the people I associate with now are all that great. Hmmm… must ponder this some more.
And if I got away with it…say a score of $250,000, then I wouldn’t have to worry about much for awhile. I wouldn’t have to borrow money from anybody. I could pay off my bills. I could give Monique some money. And then I could just hide away some place where nobody would find me. $250,000…minus $10,000 for bills, minus $40,000 to Monique, leaves me with $200,000. Invest in a fund that pays a 3% return annually = $6,000 a year.
(Chart of financial returns goes here)
Hmmm… looks like I could only survive for 10 years on that. I could live for 16 years if I did $300,000. 32 years at $500,000. That would put me at 64. Let’s try $750,000 – 78 years, I’d be 110. Okay, So, what if I spent $50,000 a year? Okay, it looks like optimally I need to get a million dollar and spend $50,000 a year, and it would last me for about 30 years. If we assume that interest rates will rise during the next 30 years, we can figure that we’d get a consistent income for that 30 years no problem.
But how to find a million dollars to steal? That’s the difficult one that we will have to ponder.
I’ve decided I want to become a criminal. After watching Ocean’s 11 and The Italian Job I’ve decided that I’m cut out to be some type of criminal. One thing about watching these shows, there’s always at least one person who has some type of disability, like hearing loss. I’d love to see a movie where one of the members of the team has a mental disability, like bi-polar disorder or schizophrenia. How about the completely dysfunctional “crew”. You’ve got your bomb expert – he’s deaf. A blind wheelman. “Lefty” the large one armed “heavy.” A safecracker with parkinsons disease. And the ring leader is schizophrenic with visual and auditory hallucinations. Yeah, I think that’d work.
I was exploring the seedier side of the Web today – sites about hacking and cracking and phreaking. I also found sites that sell alternatives to marijuana, speed, and heroin. There was also this other site that had stuff for sale… from the basic lock picks, to password generators to ways of making free cell phone calls.
I’m not sure what kind of crime I’d want to be involved in, though. Nothing where anybody got hurt. I don’t know, a good heist of some type. But not gold. Gold’s too heavy and too hard to deal with. Something like credit card fraud. Something where the only people who get really screwed are credit card companies and their insurance carriers. (Of course, the stockholders also end up getting screwed because it means a lower net income, blah blah blah.)
If I could figure out a way for 250,000 people to each send me a dollar, I’d do that. But sometimes you have to force them to give up that dollar… thus they get screwed by being investors in credit card and insurance companies. It all equals out in the wash.
Why should they be screwed? Why not? Somewhere along the way they’ve screwed somebody. We’ve all screwed and been screwed. Why not just profit from it once or twice?
And really, is getting caught that detrimental? Assuming I ever saw a prison cell, it would be a nice change I think. Sitting in a 8 x 10 cell staring at the walls. Not much different then my existence now. And there would be more people to talk to. Probably not the most pleasant of people, but it’s not like the people I associate with now are all that great. Hmmm… must ponder this some more.
And if I got away with it…say a score of $250,000, then I wouldn’t have to worry about much for awhile. I wouldn’t have to borrow money from anybody. I could pay off my bills. I could give Monique some money. And then I could just hide away some place where nobody would find me. $250,000…minus $10,000 for bills, minus $40,000 to Monique, leaves me with $200,000. Invest in a fund that pays a 3% return annually = $6,000 a year.
(Chart of financial returns goes here)
Hmmm… looks like I could only survive for 10 years on that. I could live for 16 years if I did $300,000. 32 years at $500,000. That would put me at 64. Let’s try $750,000 – 78 years, I’d be 110. Okay, So, what if I spent $50,000 a year? Okay, it looks like optimally I need to get a million dollar and spend $50,000 a year, and it would last me for about 30 years. If we assume that interest rates will rise during the next 30 years, we can figure that we’d get a consistent income for that 30 years no problem.
But how to find a million dollars to steal? That’s the difficult one that we will have to ponder.
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home